


I Trust You

by NellyHarrison



Series: Everyone Loves Felicity Smoak [2]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Mentions Oliver Queen, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Miscommunication, Physical Therapy, Stasis, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-29 03:48:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15064460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NellyHarrison/pseuds/NellyHarrison
Summary: When Diggle's old army friend, Sam Wilson comes knocking on Felicity's door, asking for help, she's hesitant at first.  Breaking Bucky Barnes free from the mental prison Hydra locked him in would be no easy task, but Felicity wasn't one to turn down a challenge.





	I Trust You

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place some time after 4x09 of Arrow and during Captain America: Civil War.

Felicity grumbled as she started rolling her chair towards the door to the apartment.  She appreciated Oliver letting her stay there until she could find her own place, but it was so big, anytime someone came to the door, she would struggle to get to them in an expedient time.  She managed to open the door without falling out of her chair, rolling back to see Diggle standing in the doorway. “Hey, I thought you weren’t coming to get me until six?” she asked, brows furrowing as he walked in.  It was only after he had passed her that she noticed the second man. “Um, who are you?”

“Felicity, this is an old friend of mine.  His name’s Sam Wilson, and he needs your help,” Diggle explained, standing next to her as Sam entered the apartment, his hand outstretched to her.

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, Miss Smoak.  Between what I’ve read in the papers and John’s stories of you, I’m a big fan,” Sam admitted, shaking her hand firmly but not too hard.  “And if we’re being specific, I’m not the one that needs your help. James Buchanan Barnes does.”

“ _ The _ James Buchanan Barnes?  The Howling Commando turned Hydra assassin?  Didn’t he just kill the king of a small African nation?  Why the hell would I want to help him?” Felicity asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

Sam sighed, his eyes darting over to Digg who simply smirked in response.  “Nice to know you’re just as fiery as I heard you were. Fiery’s good,” he started, then pulled a file out of his jacket to hand to her.  “There’s more to Sergeant Barnes than you may think. And while it’s hard to prove otherwise, he didn’t bomb the UN.”

Felicity squinted at him for a moment, not sure if she believed him, but then she opened the file.  It had evidence of the torture Barnes had been through in order to turn him into the Winter Soldier.  As she flipped through it, she found a DVD, her brows furrowing as she lifted it up. “What’s this?” she asked, meeting Sam’s eyes.

“Something we shouldn’t have but that you should see,” he replied, his expression solemn.

Rolling over to her laptop, she placed the disk inside and played the video that was on it.  Watching Barnes’s expression as he realized what the “doctor” was doing to him was heartbreaking, and his desperate attempt to escape his cell before he was reverted back to the Winter Soldier had her bowing her head.  “He’s been programmed. All it took were those words and he had no control over his mind. I can’t imagine being a prisoner in your own mind,” she muttered, sighing softly. She took out the disk, placing it back into its case before stowing it back into the file and handing it back to Sam.  “Whatever I can do to help him, I’ll do it.”

“Really?” Sam asked, genuinely surprised.  He looked over at Digg, his eyes wide.

“I told you, man.  She’s one of the good ones,” Digg replied, reaching down and giving Felicity’s shoulder a squeeze.  “I’ll tell Oliver you won’t be around for a while. I already talked to Curtis and he said he’d be more than willing to help in the Foundry until you come back,” he assured her, offering a kind grin when she reached up and squeezed his hand.  He gave her shoulder one more squeeze, then walked over to Sam and shook his hand. “I’m leaving her in your hands. If anything happens to her, you’re the one I’ll be holding responsible.”

Sam nodded, shaking his hand firmly and smacking his arm with his free hand before reassuring him, “You have my word.”  With that, Digg nodded and made his way out, leaving Sam and Felicity alone. “So, do you need to pack a bag?”

“How long are we going to be gone?” she asked, rolling towards the room she had been staying in since it was on the same floor as everything else.

“As long as it takes for you to reprogram him,” he replied.  “So you tell me.”

“It won’t be easy.  He has a long road ahead of him and removing those mental triggers to the codewords is only half of it.  How did you even get him to trust you after what happened?” she asked, glancing back at him for a moment before returning her attention to her packing.

“Well, I may or may not be working for someone that has a strong connection to him,” he answered.

“Oh yeah?  Who’s that?”

* * *

 

“You know, you could have just told me you were working with Captain America,” Felicity grumbled as she began unpacking her stuff in the makeshift room she had been given.

Sam was still laughing since Felicity had gone on an innuendo filled tangent when she first met Steve, which had ended with her making a comment about his butt that had resulted in Steve blushing deeply and squawking at Sam to show Felicity her quarters.  “You… He… Oh my god that just made my entire year,” he said between laughs, leaning against the wall as he wiped at the tears that leaked out of the corner of his eyes. “I figured you would have figured it out. Digg said you were smart,” he joked, breaking into laughter once more.

“Yeah, well I figured if Digg was only two degrees of separation from my childhood crush, he would have told me,” she retorted, shooting a glare at him only to be met with a confused smile.  “What? One of the few things my dad left behind were his father’s Captain America trading cards. It was my equivalent of boys’ Cosmo magazines,” she shrugged. “Obviously I got over it once I got older and realized it would never happen.  Of course, that was before he came out of the ice… But it doesn’t matter! Like I said, I got over it.” Besides, she was too fresh off of her breakup to think about dating  _ anyone _ , let alone the Star Spangled Man with a Plan.

“Probably for the best.  Steve just lost his best girl, so I don’t think he’s ready for someone new anyways,” Sam replied, his expression much more serious than the laughter he had just been incapable of controlling.  “Do you need to do anything before I take you to meet Barnes? I figured the sooner you two met, the sooner you can start fixing him.”

“I won’t be able to start reprogramming him until I comb through all of that data Black Widow dumped on the net a few years back.  Most of the good stuff ended up encrypted almost as soon as it was released, but I’ve hacked into tougher,” she assured him, turning her chair around to face him.  “While I’m doing that, it’ll be better if Bucky trusts me first. The last thing I need is some fight or flight response programming to kick in while I’m taking down the triggers,” she stated, rolling past him and out the door.  “Where am I going bird boy?” she called back as she continued rolling.

“Don’t start, Smoak, or I’ll reveal your big crush to Steve,” Sam shot back, chuckling when Felicity’s hands slipped as she went to push herself forward.  “That’s what I thought. Take the door to your right.”

Felicity did as instructed and pushed open the door, rolling into the large, open room.  In the middle was a machine, which caused her to slow at first sight. “Sam, where is...” she began before trailing off when she saw him.  Bucky’s arm was trapped in the machine, his body slumped against it. “Why is he like this?” she asked, rolling over quickly and looking for a way to release him.  She reached up to grab a lever when she heard a shout.

“Don’t!”  Bucky stared up at her with a concerned expression, his other hand reaching out towards her.  “Leave it.”

“Why?” she asked, shaking her head in confusion.

“Because I could hurt you,” he replied, lowering his hand and looking her over curiously.  “Who are you?”

“My name’s Felicity.  I’m here to help you,” she told him, rolling closer and bending down to extend her hand to him.  “It’s nice to meet the man I read about growing up. I’m digging the long hair. Very Kurt Cobain.”

Bucky looked at her hand for a few moments before slowly lifting his free hand to meet it.  “No offense, Felicity, but how exactly are you supposed to help me?” he asked, letting her hand go and sitting up a bit straighter.  “And why did you agree to do so? Don’t you know what I am?”

“I know  _ who _ you are.  That’s the most important part.  James Buchanan Barnes, World War II hero and best friend to Steve Rogers.  Don’t worry, I know about all of the other stuff, but considering you were tortured into compliance, I’m not about to hold that against you.  You might want to stop holding it against yourself too,” she suggested, smiling softly. “We don’t have to be defined by what’s done to us. At least I don’t plan to,” she decided, using her hands to adjust her legs on her chair.

“Do you mind if I ask what happened to you?” he wondered, his attention having shifted to her chair.  “I mean, you know my whole tragic story. I feel like I’m at a disadvantage.”

Felicity shook her head at the ploy he used, but gave in anyways.  “On the night my now-ex-fiance proposed, our car was shot up by men under orders of the leader of an organization very similar to Hydra.  I went through a bunch of surgeries, but the incident left me paralyzed. I’m lucky to have a very talented friend who was able to create something that should help me walk, but it’ll take a lot of physical therapy and even then it’s not a guarantee,” she explained.  “We’re kind of in a similar situation. You have a new, very talented friend, who is going to work her ass off to try to give you control of your mind again. But first, I’ll need to do some hacking and studying, you’ll need to learn to trust me, and even then, there’s no guarantee I’ll actually be able to succeed.  Is that something you’re willing to give a chance?”

Bucky was silent for a few moments, long enough to have Felicity turning to look at Sam questioningly.  She had come all this way; she figured if Sam had come to get her, it had meant Bucky had already given his approval.  When she glanced back at the man in question, she raised her brows expectantly. “Alright fine,” he eventually gave in.  “Steve wouldn’t have let you get this close to me if he didn’t think you could do it. I’m in.”

“Great,” Felicity replied, then reached up to grab the lever again, but once more Bucky stopped her.  “Why? You’re not going to hurt me.”

“How do you know?  I’ve hurt a lot of people,” he reminded, the guilt of his actions clear on his face.

“Because I trust you,” she replied.  Maybe it was a foolish move to trust him, since he very well could be pretending to be back in control, but if she didn’t initiate the trust, she would never get his trust back.  When he didn’t argue, she lifted her hand for a third time and this time pulled the lever, releasing his arm. The arm whirred alive and adjusted, then grew still as he relaxed. “Hey Sam?  Why don’t we give Bucky the room next to mine?” she decided, turning her chair around and starting to roll towards where Sam was waiting by the door. “I’m sure it would be much more comfortable than sleeping in here.”  When Sam looked at her with utter bewilderment, she simply mouthed, “ _ Trust _ ” and gave him a nod.

“Yeah, alright.  I’ll go let Steve know.  We’ll bring his stuff down.  Why don’t you show him where he’ll be staying, Smoaky,” he suggested, heading out and leaving the two of them alone.

“Come on, Bucky.  There’s a shower in that room with your name on it,” Felicity teased as she began rolling down towards the bedrooms, Bucky following after her with the first hint of a genuine smile he’d shown in quite a while.

* * *

 

“Don’t give up, Felicity, you’re doing great.  Keep going,” Bucky encouraged as Felicity’s arms began to shake on the bars as she tried to move her foot another step forward.

Over the past couple of days, the four of them had fallen into an easy routine.  In the mornings, while Sam and Steve went for a run, Felicity and Bucky had joint therapy, physical for Felicity and mental for Bucky.  She would ask him different questions about what he remembered of his life before, during, and after Hydra’s control and he would push her to her limits in order to get her closer to walking on her own again.  During the day, Bucky, Sam, and Steve were working on something involving who had actually bombed the UN, while she would spend hour upon hour decrypting Hydra files on the dark web. It was strenuous work, but each piece of information she found regarding Bucky’s trigger programming brought her one step closer towards breaking it down.  Then, at nights, they would share dinner, and break off into their down time. While Sam and Steve would go off into their own rooms to read, listen to music, or sleep, Felicity and Bucky would pick one of their rooms and stay up getting to know each other. They had become partners through their healing, and Felicity was grateful to have someone who genuinely understood what she was going through.

“One more step, Lis, come on, you can do it!” he encouraged further, standing close by in case she slipped but giving her enough distance to prove he believed in her.  She managed one more step, then Bucky rushed in and helped ease her back into her chair. “That was really good. I think that’s enough for today,” he decided, rolling her away from the equipment and bringing her to the mat to help her stretch.

“It was only three steps, Bucky.  It’s not like I ran a marathon or anything,” she grumbled, feeling a bit disheartened.  It was mostly because for all that she had gathered off the dark web, she didn’t feel like she had enough to give Bucky his freedom back.

“Hey, that’s three steps more than you were able to do at the beginning of this, isn’t it?” he pointed out, starting to massage her legs and shift them to stretch them.  “Progress is progress. We talked about this,” he reminded, meeting her eyes before returning his focus to her legs. “What’s really going on, huh? You’re usually the one giving the pep talks.”

Felicity sighed and pushed herself up with her hands, sitting up as he sat back across from her.  “I’m worried I won’t find the right information to let me help you,” she admitted, pinching her lips together.  It was the first time that she had acknowledged her lack of action and the reasons behind it, but Bucky didn’t explode or even frown as she did so.  “There’s still too many unknowns that if I even attempted, I could fry your brain or something,” she explained. “As annoying as you are sometimes, I kind of like your brain and everything else that goes with it.”

Bucky shook his head as he stood and helped her back into her chair, bending down so they were at eye level before saying, “I trust you, Felicity.  I know you’ll be able to figure it out, even if it takes you a little while longer,” he comforted, tapping the bottom of her chin gently before giving her a smile and straightening.  “Now let’s get some breakfast before Steve eats all the eggs again.”

“I bought two dozen!  How does one person eat two dozen eggs for  _ breakfast _ ?” she exclaimed for the millionth time as he rolled her out of the room, the sound of his laughter echoing off the walls as they left.

* * *

 

“I don’t like this,” Felicity stated as she continued rolling down the halls after Steve.  “I haven’t taken out the triggers yet. What if you run into that doctor and he gives the Winter Soldier control again?  He should stay out of this.”

“If I thought Bucky would agree to it, I would have already suggested he stay here with you, but he’s determined.  I can’t stop him from coming, Felicity,” Steve muttered, his hands clenching at his sides in slight frustration. The blonde had not stopped using what Sam and Bucky referred to as her Loud Voice at him since she found out that they were going to Russia.  “If it helps at all, there will be more than just the three of us going. We’re meeting up with some others at the airport.”

“Fine, take them and leave Bucky with me,” she insisted, still not seeing why that wasn’t still and option.  “Maybe I should talk to him. Tell him that we’ve already come too far and that we could lose all of the progress we’ve made if he leaves.”

“Felicity,” Steve spoke, his voice firm as he stopped and faced her.  “Is this really about Bucky losing himself or are you more afraid of  _ you _ losing him?”

She sat back in her seat, inhaling sharply before swallowing dryly.  Wasn’t that what she was really worried about? That she would lose the friend and ally she had made in Bucky?  That he would forget her and become something she knew he wasn’t? “I-It’s not just that,” she finally muttered, bowing her head.  “Aren’t you afraid of losing him?” she asked, glancing back up at him, knowing if anyone would understand what she was going through, it would be him.

Steve sighed, his stiff stance slumping slightly as he deflated at the thought.  “I’ve thought I lost him three times, Felicity. But somehow, every time, he makes it through.  Whatever happens on this trip, he’ll come back, even if it takes longer than you’d like,” he assured her, offering a sad smile.  “You can try to stop him if you want, but if he still wants to go, I’m not going to stand in his way,” he declared, then turned and walked away, leaving Felicity to her new dilemma.

It didn’t take her very long to decide to seek Bucky out and at least try to talk some sense into him.  She knew it was selfish, and perhaps a bit confusing considering she had just broken her engagement off with Oliver only a few weeks ago, but she didn’t want to lose him.  Maybe he cherished their relationship as much as she did enough to want to stay out of the fight. As she got closer to his room, she heard two familiar voices. She was about to join them, but then she realized they were talking about her.

“There’s nothing going on with me and Felicity, Sam!” Bucky insisted, his tone frustrated, as if Sam had been badgering him on the subject.  “She’s my friend, okay? Just like Steve is, or how you would be if you weren’t constantly questioning me about her. I get that you’re concerned about her because of whatever promise you made to her friend, but you don’t have to, alright?  Felicity is the last person I would try to get involved with.”

Felicity couldn’t bear to listen to the rest of the conversation, a lump forming in her throat as tears stung at her eyes.  It was one thing to know that he didn’t reciprocate whatever confusing feelings she had been feeling lately, but to know that he would want anyone else  _ but _ her was more than she could take.  She managed to quietly close her bedroom door and wheel herself a few feet away, but either she hadn’t been quiet enough or fate was a cruel bitch because soon after, there was a knock on her door.  Cursing softly, she quickly calmed herself down and gently wiped at her eyes and nose before rolling over and opening the door to find Bucky standing on the other side.

“Hey.  I hear you’re going to Russia,” she started, pretending she was thrilled at the idea.

“Uh, yeah, I came to talk to you about that,” he nodded, opening his mouth to continue, but he was interrupted.

“I think it’s a great idea,” she rushed out.

Bucky’s brows furrowed immediately as he looked down at her, his hands clenching where they were on his belt.  “You do?”

“Of course.  I mean, you want this closure don’t you?  You want to take out that doctor guy and stop him from letting out the other soldiers.  I get it. If I was able to walk, I would go right up to Darhk and kick his ass myself. I mean, not literally since he’s a psychopath and could kill me without a second thought, but that’s not the same for you.  You can handle yourself all on your own,” she rambled, pinching her lips together when she was done.

“I, yeah.  Right, I can handle myself,” he nodded, his jaw clenching slightly.  “Then I guess that’s that, then?”

“I guess so,” she agreed with a short tone.

“Great.  See you when I get back, I guess,” he replied, then stepped out of her doorway and began walking away.  As his angry expression sank into something more forlorn, Felicity was in her room, covering her mouth as she realized that she had just sent away the man she was falling in love with.

* * *

 

Days of complete radio silence turned into weeks.  She tried to continue her PT, but it was more difficult without someone to help her.  After the second week, she called Digg, asking him to come get her and call his contacts for information on any of the guys.  By the time he pulled up to get her, he had a file of information for her to catch up on. It seemed after a battle at the airport, Bucky and Steve had managed to escape while Sam and the others that had helped them had been temporarily incarcerated before mysteriously escaping and falling off the grid.  Tony had the Hydra base cleaned out after Bucky and Steve left, but he had not known where the two had gone after the fight he’d had with them. The report even included that Steve was without his shield and Bucky was without his arm, leaving Felicity with a sinking feeling in her stomach. She was quiet the rest of the trip home, and while he never called her on it, Diggle swore he heard some sniffling coming from her side of the car.

By the time they got back to Star City, Felicity still hadn’t spoken, but she had composed herself better.  She didn’t ask Diggle to stick around once he had helped her bring her stuff back to her room, telling him she was just going to unpack and go to bed.  They both knew she was lying, but he left anyways, and the moment she heard the door closed, she got back to work. She didn’t know where Bucky and Steve had gone, or where Sam had gone after escaping prison, but she did know that she needed to be ready to undo his triggers if she ever got the chance.  Another week passed of physical therapy in the morning followed by days and long nights of her gathering bits and pieces until she finally had what she needed: a complete process of how the triggers had been originally put into place. With this, she could backstep to remove the triggers in Bucky’s mind and make him immune to the code words the doctor had used.

Unfortunately, just because she had found this out didn’t mean she could fix Bucky.  She had no idea where he was and no means to get in touch with him. “Now what do I do?” she muttered to herself, slumping back in her chair before she was surprised with a knock on the door.  She rolled over, opening the door a little to see who it was before swinging it open. “Sam?!”

“Shhh Smoaky, don’t you know never to shout when your fugitive friend shows up at your door?” he asked, chuckling as he stepped into her place and closed the door before leaning down and giving her a big hug.  “How’re you feeling?” he asked, standing back up as he looked her over.

“Getting there, but a couple of weeks stuck in a place without anyone to train with me might have brought me back a few stages in my therapy,” she admitted, giving him a look before asking, “Where the hell have you been?  What happened to you guys?”

“I want to tell you everything, Smoaks, but not here.  How fast can you pack?”

* * *

 

Felicity sat close to the window of the Wakandan plane, looking down at the African continent flashing past below them.  Sam had told her, in detail, about the fight, including Steve and Bucky making it to Russia. He told her they were both fine, and that their other teammates had been able to move on even if they were technically fugitives too.  For all that he did tell her, she could tell that he was holding back, but she didn’t feel like asking too many questions just yet. She was still a bit uneasy since her realization regarding her feelings for Bucky after their fight, and she wasn’t sure she was ready to see him again.  She also wasn’t sure he wanted to see her at all, but she had promised she would help give him back the control over his mind. She was determined to keep that promise.

When they landed, Felicity was helped off of the plane and guided to the main lab.  She couldn’t help but gape at all of the advanced technology around her as she made her way to the main floor, her hands just itching to touch some of what she was seeing.  As they reached the bottom, she noticed a strange looking machine in the corner, with what looked like water vapor coming off of it. “What is that..?” she asked, rolling towards it.  It wasn’t until she caught a glimpse of Bucky’s face through the frosty window that she realized what the machine was. “You froze him?”

“He asked to be frozen,” Steve corrected as he walked into the lab, followed by a younger Wakandan woman and King T’Challa himself.

“What?” Felicity replied, visibly confused.  “Why would he do that?”

“He didn’t trust his mind,” the young woman said.  “But he trusted you. My name’s Shuri. I was going to find a way to heal him myself, but I believed it would be in our best interests to trust Sergeant Barnes’ judgment.  He said that if anyone could fix him, it was you, and that he should be frozen until you brought him back yourself.”

The air rushed from Felicity’s lungs at his actions, her head turning back to look at the machine as she bit down on her bottom lip.  Maybe he wanted to be with anyone but her, but he still trusted her enough to put his life in her hands. “Well then I better get to work,” she replied, offering a small smile at the others.

Despite having the process laid out for her, each trigger was so articulately put together that it took her at least an hour to break through each one.  She was physically rolled away from her station and brought to bed by Captain America himself after she cracked the sixth one. She didn’t get much sleep, but she rested enough to give her the energy and determination to get through the last four.  Once all ten had been cracked, she called in Steve, Sam, Shuri, and T’Challa to start bringing Bucky out of stasis. She sat in her chair, everyone else standing just behind her as the temperature was risen to normal and he slowly began regaining consciousness.  When the door finally opened, and Bucky was helped out by Steve and Sam, Felicity’s heart was racing.

“How ya feeling, Buck?” Steve asked, straightening him up until he was standing tall.

“Like I just walked through Central Park in the middle of January,” he retorted, eliciting soft laughter from the rest of the room.  He looked around, his eyes stopping when he saw Felicity there. “I knew you could do it, Lis,” he replied, slowly walking over and kneeling down in front of her.  “I missed you.”

Felicity exhaled abruptly before finding herself pushing out of her chair to throw her arms around him in a tight hug.  Her legs were shaky, but they supported her long enough for Bucky to scoop her up, hugging her back tightly. “I missed you too, Bucky,” she muttered, letting him help her to her feet.  She straightened her legs, putting a bit more pressure before pulling away from him a bit. “I-I think the implant’s working,” she mused, smiling up at him.

“That would be my doing,” Shuri piped up.  “I may have tweaked the coding a bit while you were napping earlier.  Next time do so in your room and not in my lab,” she joked. “It should be working just fine now.”

“Thank you, Shuri,” Felicity replied, slowly walking over and giving the genius girl a hug.

“Could Felicity and I have some time to ourselves?  I need to talk to her,” Bucky stated, drawing everyone’s attention to him.  He glanced at Felicity for a moment before looking at Sam directly. They seemed to have a silent conversation before Sam grumbled and began walking away, dragging Steve with him.  Shuri lifted a hand and began to speak before T’Challa shook his head and wrapped an arm around her shoulders to lead her away as well. Once they were completely alone, Bucky and Felicity faced each other again.  “You’re shorter than I thought you’d be,” Bucky finally broke the ice, causing them both to start laughing.

“Yeah, well you’re not as funny as I thought you’d be,” she shot back, shaking her head at him before walking closer to him.  “I like that I don’t have to wait for you to come over anymore,” she admitted, standing in front of him and looking up to meet his eyes.  “I’m really happy that it worked. You’re finally free to be your true self. You can start over and have the life you deserved. You can go out and find your perfect girl and live happily ever after.”

Bucky had originally been smiling along with her ideas, but he grew perplexed when she mentioned ‘his perfect girl’.  “Even with my mind back in my control, I can’t exactly have my perfect girl,” he said, shaking his head. “I have too much red in my ledger to deserve her.”

“What are you talking about?” she asked, reaching down and taking his hand in hers.  “Bucky, we talked about this, remember? You don’t have to be defined by what was done to you.  You’re  _ not _ defined by it.  You are not the monster they tried to turn you into.  You are still the loving, big-hearted, and frustratingly charming man you were before Hydra got their filthy hands on you.  Any girl would be lucky to be with you. I can’t imagine anyone you liked wouldn’t like you back.”

“Well that’s not true since I’ve liked the same girl for a while now and she clearly only sees me as a friend,” he retorted, shaking his head as he absently played with her fingers.

“...Wait what?” she muttered, looking up at him confusedly.  “What are you talking about?”

“It’s fine, Felicity.  I realized after our talk before Russia that you weren’t interested and I accepted that.  We can just be friends,” he assured her, not meeting her eyes at first but eventually looking up at her only to find her fuming at him.

“That is a crock of bullshit, Bucky Barnes!” she shouted at him, pushing his hands away as she took a step back.  “I heard you that day! I heard what you said to Sam! Don’t you dare make it seem like it’s  _ my _ fault that we’re not together when you said that I was the  _ last _ person you would try to get involved with.  Do you have any idea how much that hurt me? Leave it to me to fall for someone who would rather eat dirt than go on a freaking date with me,” she grumbled, crossing her arms and looking down at her feet.  She felt him move closer, the steady beat of his footsteps matching her steady, aching heart until he lifted her chin and softly said her name.

“You didn’t hear the rest of the conversation,” he told her, slipping his hands into hers as he kept her close.  “Sam had been bugging me since day one not to hurt you, and when he saw how close we were getting, he confronted me.  I told him that I would never try to get with you because you deserve so much better than me. I may not be the monster Hydra tried to make me out to be, but I still have to live with the guilt of the murders they made me commit.  That’s a darkness I’ll have to carry with me for the rest of my life, and I don’t want to burden you with something like that. After that, Sam told me that you deserved to make a choice of your own, and that I should go talk to you before I make any decisions that could impact the both of us.  That’s why I came over to talk to you. When you basically pushed me out of the door, even though you knew the risks, I figured that was enough of a sign that you weren’t interested.”

“I’m an idiot,” Felicity grumbled, her head falling against his chest in annoyance with herself.  “I had come to your room to try to talk you out of going to Russia. Then I heard the whole ‘she’s the last person I’d try and get involved with’ bit and I figured letting you do what you wanted was the best way to let go of you and what I had been feeling,” she explained, looking back up at him with a small frown.  “After you left, I realized how stupid I had been. I should have just told you I wanted you to stay.”

“Part of me wishes you had.  Russia was a mess, and I’m lucky I made it out alive,” he admitted.  “But all I really wanted to do was come back to you when it was all over, but I figured if I was going to reunite with you, it would be when I had control of my mind again.  Good job on that, by the way. I feel the most normal I have in almost a century.”

“Oh man, you  _ are  _ old,” she joked, smiling when he shot her an annoyed look.  “So you’re telling me that whole stupid fight was just one big miscommunication?” she asked, moving her hands up to his arms as she kept her eyes on him.  “Because there’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while now.”

“All I know is that my life was changed the moment you rolled in and gave me trust I hadn’t really deserved yet, and that my best chance of getting rid of my personal darkness is letting in the light you’re so clearly full of,” he told her, his hands wrapping around her waist as he pulled her closer.  “Ball’s in your court, darling.” He had barely finished the last word before she was surging up to meet his lips in a sweet, tentative kiss. Her fingers buried in his long, dark locks, deepening the kiss just slightly before they pulled away, both breathing a little heavier than they had moments before.  His forehead rested against hers as his thumbs brushed back and forth along the bit of exposed skin of her back between her top and her skirt. “We should have done that a long time ago.”

“Well we have plenty of time to do more of it, but you should go and reconnect with Steve.  He’s been waiting a lot longer to get you back,” she pointed out. “Plus, I need to make a few calls.  I kind of left without really telling anyone,” she admitted, smiling awkwardly when Bucky shook his head at her.  She leaned up and gave him another quick kiss before pushing him towards the door. “Go, and let the others know I’ll be in here calling my friends in Star City if they need me.”

Bucky smiled at her, nodding once before heading out.  Felicity pulled out her phone and was about to press Digg’s number when she heard shouting coming from the hallway.  “Felicity, don’t tell John! He’ll kill me if he finds out you’re dating an ex-assassin!” Sam yelled to her from a higher floor, the only response he got being laughter from below.  “Oh, I’m a dead man.”

**Author's Note:**

> I might end up coming back to this pairing, but that's it for now. I hope you liked it! Thanks for reading, and as always, any comments or questions are always welcome.


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